park playdate party

cake pop ball birthday cake

  

In lieu of a big birthday party for her second birthday  (we weren't about to have our friends and fam drive out on memorial day for a two-year-old birthday party), we celebrated low-key with Jayme's immediate friends at our favorite park in Brea... maybe next year we'll do up legitimate party (I just can't help myself from party planning already!)

birthday girl having a blast on the big slides (priceless face)

 

happy Jax

all the mom's (and dad) were kept plenty busy

friends and cake pops (sad I only got pics of them eating...)

Two.

Dear Jayme,

Time has flown by in the blink of an eye… so much so that you have been officially two for almost two months! I can remember the day you were born and your 1^st birthday as if they were only a few weeks ago, and now our sweet baby girl is officially two going on sixteen! Your daddy has affectionately named you “booger” and I like to refer to you as “pistol”… while you have your absolute sweetheart moments that melt our hearts, you have officially entered “that stage” that is not for the faint of heart… meltdowns in the parking lot, Target aisles, Costco, and anywhere you can get the attention to get what you want. when you want it. and how you want it. have given me and your daddy a reality check of what it means to have a two year old. I now completely understand the phrase “this is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you” when it comes to disciplining (whether it’s a swat on the bootie, a time out, or taking away a privilege that we both looked forward to)… You have always had a little sass to your personality, but now that you are much more vocal, your strong will (which is a good thing- your Nana had the same nature and was an incredible woman for it!) is taking shape each day.

 However, for every difficult moment, we have experienced just as many if not more of your sweetheart moments… your daddy and I especially love when you ask for a hug out of nowhere, give affectionate kisses and encourage family hugs and kisses after bedtime prayer (this is becoming our nightly ritual and it is one of my favorite parts of our daily routine), when you say “amo” (your version of te amo) after we tell you “I love you”, when you give sweet hugs and acknowledge “gentle” to your baby doll and friends, when you want to hold hands or “nuggle” (snuggle), when you get so excited to go see a friend or family member and that becomes your only focus until we get there, when you insist on cleaning up your little spills and messes (I’m afraid you are going to be OCD in that department like your uncle Alex), when you try to help mommy by carrying my purse in the store (even though it weighs nearly as much as you), when you enjoy quiet reading time, when you insist on watching Calliou for the 100^th time and insist that mommy or daddy must sit with you, when you get excited about learning your signs or teaching mommy and daddy new signs you have learned from Alex and Leah (Signing Time- our lunch time show), when you don’t know what to say during prayer or grace so with your head bowed and hands folded you begin to sing “the a says ahhh…” and any other letter that comes to mind from the letter factory before you end with a solid “AMEN!”, when you help mommy or daddy water the grass and the garden each day (you actually do a good job and can do it unsupervised now!), when you count to 10 or sing your abc’s while mommy does pushups/Jayme lifts (at nearly 30lbs I think Jayme lifts may be coming to an end soon), when you are miss social butterfly and super well behaved on a shopping trip (you seem to do best at the grocery store and in the “big cart” at “Ostco”), when you act like a goofball because you know it will make someone laugh, and when you say/sign “potty!” when you get nervous, anxious, or are about to get into trouble (sometimes we believe you are a little too intelligent for your own good, but that potty act doesn’t work on mommy and daddy anymore ;-) 

18 months-24 months

Things your love (in no particular order):

Gampa’s house

Daddy snuggles

Your bitty baby

Your purse (or mommy’s purse)

Shoes! Shoes! Shoes! (especially your hideous red patent leather strappy deals… I think they look like orthotics, you think they’re “prrrrreeeettty”)

Bebba, Taycie, Alex

Nanna phone chats

Sitting shot gun in daddy’s truck (when he pulls in the garage)

“Ostco” (just like your mommy when it comes to this store)

Doggies and kitties

Chocolate (bound to happen between your daddy and my love for it)

Calliou -I’m embarrassed to say how much you actually watch it :-/

Daddy snuggles before bedtime

“Au-rey” and “Ri-rey” play dates

“Nessa” “eff” “Connai” and “ky-ky” (your family away from home)

Smelling mommy’s hair, skin, and giving love pats and kisses

Coloring (especially with daddy)

Headbands (still!)

Dressing yourself (although sometimes you look like a neglected child in the wardrobe you insist on putting together… but I figure it’s a stage you will soon grow out of ;-)

The beach (you are your Bebba’s Nugget!)

Yogurt, popcorn, grampa’s ribs, and “coffee” (you have to mimic mommy with your water in a coffee mug nearly every morning)

“swings-slide-friends” (when you want to go to the park you repeatedly say/sign this with so much enthusiasm)

Dislikes:

The word “no”

Target (more like you want to have your way every time we attempt to shop there, so we both end up in a bad mood by the time we leave)

Strangers and grown men you don’t know (gives you a near anxiety attack every time)

Loud noises that are unfamiliar (you cover your ears and sometimes duck between mommy or daddy’s legs or arms)

Accomplishments/Firsts:

Swimming/wading in the ocean (this is a Bebba and Nugget “thing”)

Tent Camping (you love it, just not when we have noisy neighbors)

Potty trained by 2! You go most days without an accident (overnight is a different story, but that’s due to a water habit you have like your mommy and daddy)

Riding your tricycle (still need help steering a little)

Your vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds every day, and we now have to be careful of things you might repeat … “etto abulous!” (ghetto fabulous)

Originally we were just going to do basic signs to help you communicate before you could speak, and now you are up to somewhere over 30 signs (while not perfect, we know what your are saying- colors, play signs, people, etc.)

one year / two years

almost always wearing a smile (13-18 months)

We are so excited to see what experiences this year brings you and us as you continue to blossom out of toddler-hood and into a beautiful little girl (tear). I am personally excited to see how your nurturing skills with your baby doll transfer over to your new baby brother or sister come January ;-)

Love, Mommy & Daddy

February & March wrap up...

29 came and went way. too. fast! i can't believe its already going on mid-April and i STILL haven't written a post about turning 30... (not that anything is drastically different) I think there is this notion that we will wake up a different or radically changed person on these milestone birthdays... but alas, I am officially 30 (and then some) and nothing has changed other than my mindset to live this decade out with a greater appreciation for life and a passion to live it to my fullest potential (check back often as I am sure there will be days I will need to remind myself of this "new-and-improved mindset")
I took the month of March to do some major spring cleaning purging and limit my crafting until I have created a sense of order and necessity within our home (and weirdest thing- cleaning house has made me feel rejuvenated as well! I'm kinda addicted to this feeling and March has now carried into April)... Other than being a homebody (with occasional play-dates and tutoring for mine and Jayme's sanity sake), we really didn't do a whole lot this past month. Rather than write a novel on what's been happening (or not happening) within the past 2 months, I'm just gonna go the picture route (enter the phrase- "picture worth a thousand words" )

keeping me distracted from surprise party shenanigans (food being prepped, jayme resting up on nana's rug, random walk, mission inn date night)

late night preparations for the big day

she had as much fun as i did!

surprise!

 30th Brithday Video Montage (made by Stacey)

B.F.F.'s

Easter (egg hunt, drama queen, precious moments....and jelly beans)

 more to come....

30 days...

... until I turn 30. In lieu of new years resolutions (who actually keeps those anyway?!)... I thought since this is a big year (you only turn 3 decades once in a lifetime), I would reflect on my journey the past 29 years (more importantly the last decade which has had the most immediate effect on where my life is now), and my "goals" for my 30th year.

Things I accomplished/learned/endured:
- discovered my passion for wanting to have a positive impact on the lives of children (fancy way for saying- the classroom is where I feel at home)... also discovered if you let one lousy professor (who later got fired- go figure) decide your fate... you will regret it (I gave up on my chem prerequisite courtesy of her)

- graduated with my BA in Liberal Studies
- found my best-friend for life where/when I least expected (I'll save our "story" for another post one day), got married
-decided I love to learn (nerd party of one!)... went back to school for my masters and credential
-discovered I want to be Ghandi in the classroom (be the positive change you wish to see in the lives of impressionable children)
-survived and learned I can teach and enjoy kindergarten, special-ed pre-k AND sixth grade (much to my surprise it was one of my greatest and stressful experiences ever)

-graduated on Friday, got laid off on a Monday...
-shortly after discovered God's plan was for me to be a teacher/mother/and homemaker (does anyone even use that word anymore?)  to Jayme who came along later that year
-found that unconventional friendships can be the most inspiring
-realized I really love party planning, and paper crafting (how mommish does that sound?!)
-discovered that death and suffering sucks. and cancer. Realized my mother-in-law was one tough cookie who will always be an inspiration to me (in memory)... also realized that no matter how good a family seems to be holding it together, when the glue goes away, greed and ugliness find their way to dismantle a family in no time...
-realized my heroes are not the "superman" type, but rather they are well into their 80's (and 90's) and have endured and lived life in a way that inspires me everyday (both in my marriage and life in general)- my gramps and Ryan's grandma have both been incredible in care-taking their spouse to the very end no matter how difficult the task (emotionally and physically)
-realized that life is empty without fellowship and friends to support (no matter how awesome your marriage... friends play a critical role in life)
-realized that counting blessings can include those which are not obvious (the ability to have good credit in order to survive this economy and without a job... God's timing with having Jayme- biggest. blessing. ever.)
-realized how easy it is to take life for granted, and how crappy divorce is on a family even if you are all adults
-realized i want to spend the next decade focused on my "small family" thriving (instead of surviving) and try to be as selfless as possible (sounds lame... but until you become a parent, you don't realize how difficult it is to transition from selfish to selfless- gone are the days of shopping sprees and endless "me time")

my inspiration

I could go on, but this is the general gist (I'm sure I probably forgot something(s)

Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot..."

As Ryan and I sat somberly in the surgery waiting room this morning, I saw this verse in the National Geographic, and it struck a major chord with me. My all time favorite verse (since high school) has been Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Still one of my faves, but after the past 24 hours, I needed to hear encouraging words ... "this too shall pass" and "to everything there is a season" (this song comes to mind). Yesterday's reality check involved realizing how I took for granted the sweet sound of a baby's heartbeat... life is not a guarantee. death is. whether you are ready or not to accept it. During my routine monthly checkup the doctor couldn't find our baby's heartbeat, and as he magnified the ultrasound all I could see was the lifeless blob of white on the screen (looked like a banana, which has now given me a complex when I see the bananas on our counter and am brought to tears). 

Then the words, "yeahhhh, I'm just not seeing a heartbeat." Just a couple days shy of 12 weeks (and a week and a few days from making it to the coveted second trimester), our second child-to-be left this life and 24 hours later- my body. I immediately drew comfort in knowing that he/she is in Heaven meeting his/her nana. I know that one day we will get to meet our little angel. The past 48 hours have been a whirl wind of tests, waiting, coping, questioning (was it the sushi? the trip down the stairs? stress?), and learning to understand that I just happened to be in that odd 3% of people that have a pregnancy that is bound to fail eventually even if it is past the 7-8 week mark. 

This morning I spent my first of 30 days counting down to 30, in the hospital having a D&C. Clearly not a "light and easy topic" to talk to their patients about, I have to say that the nurses and care team @ St. Jude were INCREDIBLE, especially the random hugs and comfort in knowing your not alone (and sadly it could be worse- we could have known the gender and developed a deeper bond, or I could have been 7 months along and had to deliver a still born... I'll count this as a crazy blessing that I will hopefully be able to accept soon enough). The most peace I found today was the discharge nurse who held me and asked to pray over me (is this normal?! or did God just know it was what I needed?) 

Hopefully, as time passes and I continue to count down the days until the big 3-0, I am confident that my faith, family, and friends will comfort our loss and help as we turn a new chapter in our little White Family.